Barbara dropped the hookah and everything went to shit.
On the last day in Vegas Barb, Paul and I are walking through a mall when we come up on a hookah shop. Sammy the hookah boy offers a hit off the huge bong and I'm saying "yeah, sure why not." Sammy is playing up the Egyptian bazar thing like crazy. Among other fun lies he tells me that the hookah is great for your health and I've decided to play along.

I'm haggling with Sammy for about 20 minutes and Paul and Barbara are hitting the hookah. I've only got him to $120 for the package deal and since he doesn't get to my self imposed $100 limit on stupid purchases I'm ready to go. Finally Barbara blurts out, I'm buying one.

At this point Paul just about shits. We are flying Southwest in a couple of hours and he absolutely does not want to be in group "C". I think the first time he said it was about 5 minutes after he landed – I’m sure he’s been thinking about it for the last 48 hours.

Paul starts in on the hookah again and this time I join him while Barb tries to squeeze Sammy to throw more into the deal. Finally, Barb gets the hookah and we are on our way. We're not quite running, but we aren't stopping for anything either.

Just as we're getting to the end of the mall, Barb drops the hookah and the damn thing shatters. Paul shits. I laugh. Barb is pissed. We run back to Sammy only to find him putting the sweet talk on a couple of hookah groupies (hey, Barb says, didn't he say he was married?).

While Sammy and Barb are working the whole thing out Paul gets a beer at a neighboring bar and I camp out at the hookah. I'm still smoking my ass off when Paul gets back from his beer. We both hit the hookah and I find myself answering questions of passers by. “Sure, I guess you could smoke that shit through a pipe. But, dude,(big exhale) why. (take a hit) This thing kicks ass. (exhale and pass to Paul) Dude you aughta check it out.”

Finally Barb gets the hookah together and has Sammy ship it to her house. Now, we are running. All the way through the mall and down the street to Bally’s where we get our bags and a cab to the airport. Not only are we in “C”, we walk up as the plane is boarding. We are the last three people on it.

But, I’m cool. I smoked enough hookah snot to keep me high for two days.